Chronically Beautiful!
  • Home
  • About
  • PODCAST
  • Chronically Beautiful Blogs
    • Chronically Beautiful
    • Chronically Delicious
    • Chronically Healthy
  • Published Articles & Podcasts
  • Gift Shop
  • The Chronically Care Project
    • Care Package Application
    • Rise Above Lyme Sign Up
  • Contact
  • Disclaimer

Chronically Beautiful!

Picture

I Used to Think...

11/30/2015

1 Comment

 
I used to think that I was a princess, and one day I would live in a castle.  And somewhere in time my Prince Charming would come and rescue me from the easily recognizable villain.  I used to think that life could be a fairy tale if you so desired it to be.  I was wrong.  

I used to think that makeup made me pretty...  That no matter how many flaws I had, I could disguise them and nobody would know.  I used to think that the drab and dull face I saw in the mirror every morning was exactly what other people saw as well.  I used to think that physical display is what made you beautiful.  I used to think I was ugly.  I was wrong.

I used to think that I would marry my first love.  I used to think that when a guy told me he loved me he actually meant it, and when the words slipped from his prevaricating lips, it meant forever.  I used to think that no person could ever have a heart cold enough to hurt me.  I also thought that love was simply an intense emotion of sorts.  I used to think I knew what love was.  I didn't. I was wrong.   

I used to think that everything, at the core of its source, was full of goodness.  I used to think that words were always pure and truthful, no matter who they came from.  I used to think that if someone said that I was worthless, than it must be true.  I used to let people tell me what I think.  I used to believe that what I thought was invalid.  I was wrong.

I used to think that emotional pain was worse than physical pain.  I used to think that illness was something that only happened to "other people."  I believed that my blissful life could not possibly be spun so quickly that it hurt.  I used to think I'd always have my loved ones by my side, and that luxury could not possibly be turned around so quickly.  I used to think that I had to do things all by myself.  And when things got hard, I simply had to keep my feet planted on the ground and keep going even if that meant I was going all alone.  I used to think that asking for help was a sign of weakness.  I was wrong.

It's incredible how life changes you.  How it crushes your innocence, devours your hope, and simultaneously brings out your inner beauty and lets your strength bloom.  The hardest things in life bring you to true discovery of oneself.  I've come to know that life isn't always what I thought it was, but it's still what I make of it.

I've come to know that I'm not a princess, but something much more than that.  I've come to know that just because I don't live in a castle, doesn't mean I'm not royalty in the sight of God.  I've come to know that Prince Charming isn't so easy to find, and that some of those who claim to be princely are the villain in disguise.  I've come to know that life is not a fairytale, but an incredible journey that gives the phrase, "Happily Ever After" a much deeper meaning than we as human beings can even comprehend. 

I've come to know that makeup is not what makes a girl pretty.  It simply enhances the natural beauty that takes place underneath it all.  But real beauty, true beauty, that's something that comes from under your skin.  Something located in your heart.  Just because I see a drab, sick, and exhausted face in the mirror some mornings, does not define who I am as a person, or my level of beauty on the inside.  I'm not ugly just because somebody says I am.  My scars and flaws do not define me.  How you look on the outside does not define who you are on the inside and what a mirror tells you is the least of truths.  

I've come to know that marrying my first love would be the worst decision I could ever make.  I've come to know that true love is so much more than just an inner stirring of the heart.  I've come to know that people lie and that true love is so much more than just words.  I believe that we as human beings cannot fully comprehend the depth and extent of true love, but that we are blessed to experience a piece of it in this life.

I've come to know that not everything in life is good just because someone says it is.  I've come to know absolute truth is a real thing, established by God.  I've come to have a mind of my own, and I believe that standing for truth is of utmost importance in life.  I've come to know that I'm not worthless just because somebody states that I am, and in God's eyes I have a worth far above the price of rubies, as does all of God's children.      

I've come to know that pain comes in all forms, and that physical pain is incredibly excruciating as is emotion pain.  I've come to know that illness isn't just something that happens in other countries, or to "other people," but it's something that can take place in the walls of my own home, my neighbor's home, or even within my own body.  Illness is astonishingly real all around us, and when it steals your quality of life from you or a person you love, it's incredibly tragic.  But even with all of that said, it's okay.  It's okay to feel pain.  You are never alone, and asking for help is not a sign of weakness.  God and our Savior, Jesus Christ, know exactly what you're going through and leaning on Him is what will bring you to your highest degree of strength and happiness even through your hardest times. 

Life is an incredible journey.  A journey of hardship, trials, laughter, love, joy, and endless growth and learning.  I haven't learned all that there is to learn yet, but I find it incredibly crazy how much I've grown and changed over the years.  I went from aimlessly wandering, to having a desire to put the most important things first in my life, because you never know when those things will be gone.   Having a chronic illness, or watching someone you're close to go through that level of pain and suffering, is a rare and beautiful experience that leads to incredible growth of character.  It takes a lot of faith and hope, something that I refuse to lose as I go through life.  Life's a journey.  Yes, it's painful.  And yes, it's a struggle.  But there is so much to learn in this beautiful journey and learning is the start of a beautiful life. 
Picture
1 Comment
Eliana Coy
12/3/2015 18:26:02

Thank you Claire. I don't know why, but this was exactly what I needed to hear right now. I miss you terribly. I hope you have a wonderful Christmas. :) if you want to talk at all I would love to talk/text with you. Are you coming up for Christmas? If so, I don't know when, but there is a casual stag Christmas dance/party at the school. It even includes a ugly sweater contest. Whatever you do though, I just want you to know how special and talented you are. You are an inspiration to me. Thank you for sharing your beautiful testimony. You are superb. <3
~ Eliana Coy

Reply

Your comment will be posted after it is approved.


Leave a Reply.

    Introducing:
    Chronically Claire

    Picture
    I'm Claire, I have Chronic Lyme Disease, and I believe that life is absolutely beautiful!
    Picture
    Our logo represents love and passion being infused into every aspect of what we do here at Chronically Beautiful. Our goal is to knit hearts together as we spread love, compassion, and awareness to those who are suffering.

    Categories

    All
    Adulting With Lyme
    Anxiety
    Beauty
    Betrayal Trauma
    Chronic Illness Truths
    Courage
    COVID19
    Dating
    Depression
    Endometriosis
    Faith
    Family
    Friendship
    Healing
    Healing My Brokenness
    Holidays
    Informational
    Inspiration
    Invisible Illness Myths
    Joy
    Love
    Lyme Stories
    Marriage
    My Story
    Pain
    Sick
    Strength
    Winter
    Worth

    RSS Feed

    Archives

    June 2021
    November 2020
    October 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    February 2018
    February 2017
    January 2017
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015

    "The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.”
    ~Elisabeth Kubler Ross
    View my profile on LinkedIn

Blogs

Chronically Beautiful
Chronically Delicious
​Chronically Healthy

Chronically Claire

About
Lyme Disease
Endometriosis

Support

Disclaimer
Contact
© COPYRIGHT 2015. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
Picture
Disclaimer: For Educational and Informational Purposes Only.  The information provided by Chronically Beautiful is for educational and informational purposes only, and is made available to you as self-help tools for your own use.  All and any information given on my website is for the purpose of sharing information to help you help yourself, and not for me to take on any other role as any health professional.
  • Home
  • About
  • PODCAST
  • Chronically Beautiful Blogs
    • Chronically Beautiful
    • Chronically Delicious
    • Chronically Healthy
  • Published Articles & Podcasts
  • Gift Shop
  • The Chronically Care Project
    • Care Package Application
    • Rise Above Lyme Sign Up
  • Contact
  • Disclaimer