This Chronically Spiritual Life…

I often find it breathtaking how the bright blue sky seems to have its own special glow every morning.  My heart seems to take flight and my love for my Heavenly Father increases every time I pull back the curtain and gaze at that brilliant blue sky.  In that moment my heart is full, and my mind seems to proclaim to my heart, "He created this!  And He blesses you with this!  What more could you ask for when you have the sun and the sky smiling down on you every day as a blessing from your Creator?"

I get that same feeling in my heart when I walk by honeysuckle and breathe in the sweet scent of nature.  That same feeling comes when I walk barefoot in the grass, or touch the soft leaves of a nearby, tree or bush.  It's almost as if nature connects me to God in the most miraculous way. 

Nature is not the only thing that connects me with the Heavens.  I get that same feeling when I laugh so hard that my stomach hurts.  I get that same feeling when I'm singing praises to my Heavenly Father.  I get that same feeling when the sound of children laughing and playing sings through my window in the early summer evening.  I even get that same feeling when tears escape my eyes and I remember that even at this low moment in time, God loves me, and to Him my worth is that which is far above the price or rubies.  I get that feeling when I’m creating memories with the people that I hold close to my heart that God blessed me to have in my life.

What an incredible swelling of the heart.  What a beautiful knowledge that Christ lives and loves us.  Every small moment of peace and joy is my reminder that He lives and that God loves me.  Joy and peace are miracles that can be easily missed in households of chronic illness, but if you stay attentive, grateful, and in tune with the Spirit, they'll fill your heart even at your lowest moments.

Chronic Lyme disease has taught me many things.  One of which would be to appreciate the small things.  The small things that aren’t so small when you struggle to get out of bed on some days.  Every breath I take is a blessing given to me from God.  Every time I can walk by myself, every time I feel peace and serenity, every pain free moment is a blessing.  In fact, such simple things are miraculous enough to be considered miracles in my eyes.  I have witnesses numerous miracles, and the gift of slow and steady healing is a miracle within itself.

It’s hard for me to admit that I’m grateful for this disease on some days.  The pain is hard, the fatigue is extreme, and the heartache is sometimes too much to bear.  The thing that keeps me going is the knowledge that my Heavenly Father loves me and He is fighting this battle alongside with me.  Lyme has increased my love for God.  How can I not be grateful for that?

Every article I write involves God because He is such a huge part of life, and a huge part of my healing!  God has healed me thus far, and He continues to every day.  Even when it feels as though I have been left to suffer alone, I know that He is silently watching over me.  That knowledge brings me great comfort and joy.  I’m so grateful for the miracles that God blesses me with, and for my faith that keeps me going on my hardest of days. 

I believe that I will suffer greatly in this life, and at times it has and will feel like it’s more than I can handle.  Through it all, I must remember that God is on my side.  I believe that we must plunge into life faith first, with our love for God and His love for us lighting our way.  God has never promised to reduce the size of our trials if we follow Him, but He has promised to fight alongside us in our everyday battles as we choose to follow him and rely on Him in all walks of life.  God loves each and every one of us and His plan for us is beyond our mortal comprehension.  I’m so grateful for the gospel and my faith guiding my way through life.  I pray that we can all come closer to God through our trials.  Life isn’t easy, but it isn’t supposed to be.  I have felt God’s hand guiding me through this illness, and guiding me through my life.  He’s there, He loves us, and we are never left alone.

I’m Claire, I’m chronically ill, and I love this chronically hard, chronically spiritual, chronically beautiful life!